Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
Randomize
