You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
Last night I got drunk on margaritas at an Irish pub and came home with only one shoe. I have to get my shit together.
You really know how to show Monday who's boss.
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
Randomize
