You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Randomize
