if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
So, you didn't have time to come pick me up but you did have time to get plastered and then write "champagne money" on every one of my statuses for the past month?
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Randomize
