Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
My boss asked me to pass over one of my business cards and instead I had condoms fall out of my wallet, how’s your day going??
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