He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
My vagina is very pro this idea
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
Randomize
