Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
Randomize
