Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
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