Me. At least after what I've been through.
yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
Randomize
