just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"?
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
Randomize