I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
