I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
so the x-ray technician didnt buy my story of falling off a curb. she said a fall of that height couldnt snap the bone that way. bitch called me a drunken idiot too. if she wasnt so hot i'd be angry
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
It’s bad enough my brother slept with half of the sorority this year, but now he’s lifeguarding at the club and every divorcée and cougar in town is asking me for his number. My twin is a manwhore and I’ve become his pimp.
Randomize
