capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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