There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
I forgot wine drunk hurts
Randomize
