Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize