I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
Randomize
