but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
oh my god I have a fantastic druncle story to tell you. It involves a burrito, a meltdown and a bear
The burrito and meltdown are standard, but I'm intrigued by the bear
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
Randomize
