So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
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