Those balls look pretty dangerous.
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
It's my coworker's last day party and I'm the one who ended up shitfaced on the train with half a bottle of belvedere in my bag.
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
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