idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
I recorded his drunk dial calls. My personal favorite was the one that began, "grab the bull by the horns and fuck his cock."
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
Theres a handprint of sauce on my frig, one streaked across my face, a trail of it to my bedroom and sauce all in my bed and i have no idea what the fuck i ate.
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
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