belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
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