How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
it was only during my walk of shame that i realized i was wearing the exact same outfit that julia roberts wears on the dvd cover or pretty woman. prostitution is my destiny.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
not ubering you a puppy
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
Randomize
