She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
sex in a hospital.. check
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Randomize
