Its about making memories worth repressing
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
Randomize
