Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
Met Dan at the park for lunch and the guy parked next to us was getting a BJ the entire time. Way to make me feel like an inadequate girlfriend, random park skank. All Dan got was a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea...
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
Randomize
