Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
The empty keg landed on my head. It's a good thing we already got shitfaced or i'd be a vegetable and the humor would be completely lost.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
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