drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
Randomize
