I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
How high are you rn
Well I just ate a cheesecake straight from the box with a fork and now I’m laying upside down in a recliner chair seeing if I can Uber eats Doritos
So not that high
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