Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
Naked. naked and bneed help.
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Randomize
