its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
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