So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
my fart just smelled so bad i acutally gagged
just because you are now my girlfriend does not mean you can text me nasty shit
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
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