You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
Randomize
