hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
Randomize
