No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
