Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
I'm getting married
To pizza
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
Randomize