My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
I told him he was a man of science and that he should conduct experiments on my tits to see how they stay up. I need you to hold onto my larynx when I'm drunk.
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize
