What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
New bet. First person to fuck their girlfriend and narrate the whole thing in Morgan freemans voice wins. You are disqualified if she asks you about. My girlfriend is on her rag. U have the headstart. Your move...
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
Vodka?
Forever.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
Randomize
