I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
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