I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
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