actually, I'm a sock model
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
Randomize