It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
40s are totally the cure
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
Randomize
