I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
Randomize
