plz talk dirty to me
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
Randomize