if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
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