I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Randomize
