I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
Randomize