yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
Welp, I just herniated a vocal cord during sex. How was your night?
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
Randomize
