you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
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