You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
Randomize
