everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
When this bachelor party is over and your life is in ruins, you have my permission to die.
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
What happened to fro yo and sex?
In other news, I woke up still drunk and I think I literally just broke the Guinness book of world records for most bloody Mary's in one day...
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
Randomize
