with your own penis?
This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
The dentist just called my mother to confirm the appointment that I made on his answering machine at 4:33 am this morning..
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
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